I don't just pick her up and put her back in her crib. No I lift her up and bring her in close and just stand there and hold her. She rests her head on my shoulders and we just stand there in the dark. Nothing else at that point matters to me. I'm not sure how long I ever stand there for, until it feels right I guess. I think back about our day and all the stresses throughout the day just go away, because I am holding my daughter at that point. I give her kisses on the top of her head. I tell her I love her over and over again. A child can never get tired of hearing that their parents love them.
This is my solitude. This is my calm after a busy day. This completes my day. And I savor these moments because I know they won't last forever and because it's basically the only time she sits still these days. I sway from side to side in the complete darkness and it's like we become one. She molds to my body and just let's me hold her. Knowing that Mommy loves her.
When I am done I lay her in her crib, but her binkie in give her piglet and cover her with her blanket. I tell her goodnight.
I cherish those moments. My secret snuggles.
